DARE TO MAKE CHANGES & THE DIFFERENCE

It is quite normal for some people to think I am being paid to do social work . I don't blame them as this is a materialistic world and most people won't do any extra work without getting any rewards or cash benefits. I know there are those who sit in certain committees do receive some sort of allowance. I have to clarify here I am not receiving a single sen either from a government agency or an NGO.

Well, when there's a call for help, I would see what sort of case it is. Personally, I will help them sincerely after I am convinced there's a genuine case. I have realized help is sometimes difficult to come by and I dare say this due to my own experiences and awful encounters.

There is no emergency fund, one leader told me and there are many reasons given by another leader and after much appealing still not a sen reached the poor victim. Then, I realized the people around dared not help due to certain reasons. They talk a lot and some are very sarcastic towards the poor victim. They say things quite sensitive that I am a non-muslim. So what, my heart is pure and I can feel their pain so I always help with full compassion. Always taking in consideration their culture and religion with full respect.

Help is hard to come by and life is extra hard with lots of pressure leading to a kind of mental torture that makes a person behave strangely. There must be a change and the poor victims , ladies especially must rise up and voice out. Or there will be no end to mental and physical torture. They must be brave to fight for their rights and what they should deserve. How can some leaders and neighbours just stand and stare? I don't mind being the one to make the difference if it takes criticisms, back-biting, threats and even summons.

There are sometimes police reports after police reports including several medical reports but domestic violence cases are still going on. Unless, those husbands are put behind bars, will they realize how much sorrow and destruction they have done to their wives and children. I see those hard-core alcoholics who never changed a bit. The same goes with the drug-addicts, gamblers, womanizers and the heavily debtors to Along.

I saw with my own eyes how their wives and children suffer. There is one case where the victim's mother-in-law will forever side her son who is the cause of the problems. The children were violent and they used to experience traumas and phobia. Only after a woman's organization stepped in to help that the problems can be overcome. We saw positive changes, we've saved lives and brought peace at last to the family. Interim Protection Orders ( Section 4 and 12 of the Domestic Violence Act 1994 ) can protect the victims and their children. This can be obtained from the court through the welfare officer. Everyone in the whole country should know that domestic violence is no longer a family matter, it is a crime if there is hurt and torture.

The same goes with a family left stranded without any money, water supply , food and basic needs. We have to report this case to the appropriate authorities like the Penghulu, Ketua Kampung, the ADUN of the area , the Member of Parliament, the political parties , the Social Welfare Departments,government agencies, NGOs like Women Organizations, religious societies and anybody who can help. Help should be rendered quickly without considering the person's skin colour, gender, religion or polital party he or she supports. Then only can we trust the slogan, "Rakyat didahulukan, Pencapaian diutamakan". Sad to say, this is not always true.

Sometimes single mothers will have to wait until the cow jumps over the moon because the authorities want to see the divorce court letter. By that time, their husbands have disappeared into thin air or fled. Some men will prefer SEX with another sexy woman or women and lead a care-free life than to return to their children or estranged wife. They will choose to remarry and escape from their troubles and sins and keep a distance from their wife whom they took the vow to love forever on their wedding day. No, many will not return no matter how sweet their wife looks or how good she is. We have too many real life proofs. So I think single mothers suffer a lot. Luckily, my close friend is doing her best here for them and I too will give her the support she and the others need. We need more brave ladies to help other ladies.

Many hospitals are now OSCC or One Stop Crisis Centres or Pusat Khidmat Sepadu and I really hope they are functioning properly. I wish to serve in a small way and I have gone through a counseling course which has helped me improve on my skills in helping others and it does work. Am always ready to accompany them to make police reports too or go to the hospitals for medical treatment and to get medical reports.

Many a times, when I visit them I usually bring along some food, give them some badly needed cash , the little that I can afford and do some counseling. Of course, going to the Social Welfare Office is my routine. Sometimes, they have to wait a long time as there are a few procedures. Some will tell me they haven't received a single sen even though they have handicapped kids etc. Something is wrong somewhere and I have to find out the reason for it. Most often, they do not know where anbd how to seek help. I can see the pain and sorrow in their eyes when they relate to me their sad stories. I sometimes wonder why people who have titles to their names can't do anything to help and won't even step into their houses . Why is society full of hypocrites?

My soft spot is crying easily . As I was relating one case to Dato Hj Daud,our Selama assemblyman, he offered me a tissue. Yes, I was hurt pretty badly in a recent case when my genuine gesture to help a family to fix back their water supply that was cut for a month turned back against me. Yet, with my persistence and determination I strived on to help the family more and others better. I will survive for these unfortunate people , I have to and I have vowed I'll do it. When the time is right, I may even seek the help by meeting the Ruler or the Sultan of Perak himself to seek help. Why do I say so? It is because His Royal Highness who bestowed me the Pingat Jasa Kebaktian (P.J.K. ) medal and it is with full respect towards him that I will refer to if help is needed or when his rakyat and I need his help. He will understand I am sure how his rakyat is suffering.

There is a case of an old lady who had been wandering around and the people say she's insane or there are evil spirits in her house. Even little children tell me, their mother said she is crazy. I have done some investigation myself and have proven that all are nonsense. What had driven a person to wander in the streets should be studied if we want to help a person. Nobody asks to live in poverty or a life of a lunatic. It is all due to lack of love, care and concern from their relatives and friends. For years no one really cared, believe me. There was not even a proper kettle to boil water in her home. Great transformation has been done only these two weeks.

In one case the person's savings and jewellery were swindled away by close relatives. That drove her to almost insanity but luckily help has arrived even though the suffering had been endured for a long time. Hopefully with much love, care and attention shown by care givers will help her regain full awareness. It is prolonged stress, worries, sorrow and anger that drive people to loose control of themselves. I found that for years no one cared for the person's welfare but only the opportunity to get hold of her money or property. Some will hope to drive the person to insanity and early death for obvious reasons. This is cruel culture and very unhealthily committed by educated people on the weak and helpless.

By being involved in helping others, I've learned a lot about other people's characters. When someone said I am a true Malaysian, I must admit I truly am. When I see people, I see people as they are, whether they are Malays, Chinese or Indians, a Muslim, Christian or Buddhists, they are the same. In fact, I wish all Malaysians be treated fairly and we really respect one another, stay united and contribute to our country's progress. Together, we must join hands to combat social ills like poverty, prostitution, drug addiction,domestic violence, sexual abuse and harassment,gangsterism and others. If we all cooperate and reach out to help others, the society will advance better, practise healthier and safer lifestyle and save the environment. How sad to see leaders and people who stir up racist issues, create hatred and show disrespect towards others through violent acts.

In the course of doing all these, there are good friends who care and wish to share so they do chip in one way or another. I am truly touched by their deeds and sincerity. Especially, this lady whom I have helped and she herself has seen light outside the dark tunnel and is now helping others. Some good friends have thanked me and wish to join in. Others may prefer to keep a low profile but would contribute in other kinds . We can't force people to help when they are not ready. I understand people live in fear and some are hypocritical too. Due to rumours , there are people who dared not enter the house of this particular lady or touch her things as they believe she is keeping spirits. This again is sheer nonsense. Moreover, I learn to respect the Muslim culture and religion especially, always encouraging them to have faith in their religion, pray hard and gain spiritual strength.

All I can say is at the end of the day , I am contented if I see some progress but before I sleep I do think of those suffering too. Every day is a new day of hope and they should live cheerfully despite the pain and hurt. I am there to hold their hands or give them a hug. My thoughts for my dearest mum who is still alive is always there and all that I do, I hope that she will receive the goodness of it so that she will always be well. I am thankful and appreciate every moment I am alive.